My name is Brian and I'm a Tri-City sports guy.

 

I know the difference between a Wildhawk and a Golden Hawk; a Warrior and a Centaur; and I can tell you what a Siskin really is.

 

I remember when the Perimeter Institute was a hockey bubble; when Moose Winooski's was a miniature golf course; when every elementary school had a ball diamond; and when beauts at recess were gems in my bag of marbles, not pretty girls in the playground.

(Although that last one later changed dramatically)

 

I believe that soccer fields are more useful than cemeteries; curlers, ringette players and figure skaters deserve the same respect (and proportional ice time) as hockey players; that skateboarders are just kids, not criminals; and that road hockey should be an Olympic sport.

 

I love knowing that there are tons of great trails in our region for running, biking and cross-country skiing…even though you'll never catch me doing any of those things.

 

I've consumed hot dogs at the Battle of Waterloo (both high school and university versions); salty popcorn at a Rangers game; cotton candy at the Buskers; and way too many wings at Morty's and the Huether trying to figure out why my favourite team lost.

 

I've had memberships at Good Life, Columbia Lake, Northfield Racquet Club, the YMCA and Movati; and I've successfully annoyed people at all five.

 

I've coached Renegades and Rebels, Highlanders and Panthers (the Preston ones, not the Glenview ones) in football, basketball, track and field, slo-pitch, bowling, chess (yes - chess!), billiards and debating.

Sometimes we won and sometimes we lost. But we always had fun.

 

I saw Mike Moser grab rebounds for UW; Bob McKillop hit towering shots onto the expressway for those "other" Panthers;  and Jim Reid run roughshod over everybody for the Purple and Gold.

 

I watched Scott Stevens play for the blueshirts before he was a Stanley Cup champion; Jamal Murray dominate in Grade 8 way before he became a lottery pick; and Lennox Lewis catch passes and dunk balls for the Gaels of Cameron Heights before he was a heavyweight champion.

 

I once took a nine but left the environment undisturbed on the 18th hole at Savannah; rolled a 205 at Towne Bowl wearing ugly shoes that hurt my feet; and organized a slo-pitch team with uniforms even uglier than those shoes.

 

I had my picture taken with Dustin Johnson, Isiah Thomas and the Wealthy Barber - all in the same year!

That doesn't make me a celebrity…or does it?

 

When I was a kid, I climbed the fence at Centennial Stadium late at night with my buddies just so we could have a race on the track.

I tore my best pants but it was worth it. Just don't tell my mom.

 

I used to ride my bike to the top of Wilson Avenue so I could watch forbidden movies at the drive-in theatre where Toys R Us now sits.

It was also worth it. But again, don't tell my mom.

 

I know who the Kraut Line was; what Tuffy Knight's real first name is; where Victor Davis, Sarah Pavan and Ian Leggatt went to high school; why WLU has had two different full names; and when Eastwood, Cameron and St. Jerome's each won OFSAA basketball titles…and St. Bennies almost did.

 

I remember when Conestoga College had a rink, Jacob Hespler had grass but no lights, St. Mary's had girls but no boys, SJAM was a hill, Huron Heights was a field and Seagram's was a stadium, not just a whiskey.

 

I laced up the skates of three different sons at six different rinks, taught them each how to ride a bike and swing a club whether they wanted to or not, and survived Parents & Tots swim lessons in the warm pool while singing "Wheels On The Bus" loudly and proudly 87 times.

 

And if I could do it all over again, I would…in a flash.

 

Erb is a founding father, not a spice.  And Father David Bauer is a legend, not just a complex.

 

Before there was Tiger and Rory, there was Gary Cowan and Moe Norman.

 

And 5-1-9 is an attitude, not just an area code.

 

My name is Brian and I'm a Tri-City sports guy.